Biweekly Bits #26: Always a New Lesson to Learn

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Every year that you live, there are more lessons to be learned. And I look forward to them, even if they are difficult ones.

Biweekly Bits #25: Pick Your Battles

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Pick your battles. Not everything in your life requires that you respond to it. It took pretty much the entire 26 years that I've lived thus far to learn this one. I don't think I'm done with this one either.

Biweekly Bits #24: Encourage others

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Encourage others. My senior year of college, I was a tutor for students in 100-level biology and chemistry. All of them were students of color, many of them were first-generation students as well, and all were science or pre-health majors, and were struggling in the intro science classes that they were required to take. But we worked hard, and they had practice problems and analogies (and the occasional marker thrown at them for saying foolishness). But I didn't realize until much later that the greatest thing I did for them was that I believed that they could do this whole college thing. One of them said to me one day, "Shanique, sometimes I think you believe in us more than we believe in ourselves." My reply to her was, "Well, someone has to believe in you." They all have either graduated from college, or will graduate this academic year.

Biweekly Bits #23: Speaking the Truth, Graciously

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Everything that's true doesn't need to be said. I'm not saying to lie to people, but if the truth isn't constructive (constructive => construct => building up), then is it beneficial right at that moment? For example, when I was in fourth form (~9th grade), one of the girls in my class decided to shorten her school uniform skirt by folding its hem on itself and stitching it up. As a result, her school skirt had a hem of about 5-6 inches, which was quite noticeable, and quite frankly, did not look good. She was also sporting a red weave that day. Self-conscious, (mostly thanks to the snide remarks coming from other students) she asked one of the other girls how she looked. The girl replied, "Your hair looks bad, your skirt looks bad; you on the whole look bad." Was it true? Yes. Did it need to be said? Probably not. Definitely not in that manner. (Also, refer to #17.)

Biweekly Bits #22: Tell others how much you appreciate them

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Tell people how much you appreciate them. This past year, one of my favorite secondary school teachers passed away quite suddenly. She made a huge impact on my life, and taught me how to dodge markers aimed at my head, as well as the most excellent Spanish (I stopped Spanish after 5th form/10th grade and my senior year of college I took the Spanish placement exam and placed into 300-level Spanish [i.e. almost SIX years later]). I never got to tell her how much I appreciated her, or even that I ended up being a language major in college. How I wish I had.

There's a saying, "Give people their flowers while they're alive." You know, when they can still smell them, when they can appreciate their beauty and feel the love with which they were given.

When you're young, sayings like that don't mean much to you: you think that everyone is going to live forever, yourself included. But then someone passes away suddenly -- an accident, an undiagnosed health condition, a sudden illness, a crime snatches them away from you all too soon. Then you realize, life isn't forever, and someone, anyone could die before you were able to tell them how much they meant to you, how much of an impact they had on your life, or how much you looked up to them. And you're left thinking, If only I'd said "I love you" one more time, or I wish I could have told her how much she meant to me.

When my secondary school Spanish teacher, Mrs. Wilson passed away suddenly last year, I was shocked. She was my mother's peer at school, so she wasn't an old woman. She was vibrant and inspiring. She was a phenomenal teacher and not only taught me some excellent Spanish, but she encouraged me so that I was confident in using the Spanish that I knew, and figuring out how to work around what I didn't know. I never got to tell her how much she inspired and impacted me, or that I'd decided halfway through college to add a language major. (I also still have her copy of Punto por Punto but I never told you that, because I'm still afraid of her.)

I wish that I could tell her what her teaching, both Spanish lessons and life lessons meant to me. I wish I could tell her what an amazing woman she was. But she is already gone, so I'm hoping that she knew. Instead, I will tell the other inspiring, impactful people in my life how much they mean to me, how much I admire them. I encourage you to do the same.

Be blessed and shine with appreciation!

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Biweekly Bits #21: Let your grain die

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. (John 12:24). Your greatest impact is found in dying to self. If you're just caught up in you, you can't bear any fruit. I'm pretty sure this verse will teach me many more lessons in life.

I never noticed this verse in John until a few years ago, but it has stuck with me ever since. These words of Jesus speak one of the greatest truths of Christ's life on earth and our responsibility as we walk with Him. This truth is that service costs us.

And serving does come with a cost. It requires us to put ourselves, our desires and wishes aside for the good of others. If each of us is a grain of wheat, it is only in allowing ourselves to be used by God, to be emptied of ourselves, that we can multiply and have impact.

Too often we have this individualistic view of service and ministry, which can make us lose sight of our goal, which is Christ, and spreading the Gospel throughout the earth. Too often we are afraid to take risks in our walk with God, not knowing that it is only by the death of that single grain that new life can come to many. Something must be sown for the harvest to be reaped.

So today I challenge you to focus on where in your life you've been afraid to let your grain of wheat die. I challenge you to allow the fruit resulting from your grain to be nourished and grown. Let us live a life of service to others, for it bears much fruit.

Be blessed and shine, bearing much fruit!

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Biweekly Bits #20: Sometimes, you have to say no

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Sometimes, you have to say no. My mother always used to tell me when I was younger that I didn't know how to say no. As a consequence, I was always too busy, and my time was over-committed, so much so that I'd catch a cold and be sick for weeks because I didn't have time to get better. But gradually, I've learned to say no (or at least, "not right now"), because I don't have time to do all these things and do them well. (See also #10).

The Christian walk, in addition to being a relationship with Christ and a religious practice is a call to serve others. Thus, as Christians, Christian women in particular, we often feel like we can never say no to others who need our help, and we end up over-extending ourselves. (Anybody else feel that way?)

However, we forget that while Christ calls us to take up our cross, and to go into all the world, and to love others as He has loved us, he has also called us to find rest in Him. Yes, my friend, there is a place in Christ for his followers to take rest. And in order to rest, sometimes, you need to say no to all of the various things that pull us in seventeen different directions simultaneously.

Saying no doesn't mean that you aren't committed to your ministry, and it doesn't mean that you are not committed to Jesus. To take time to rest does not mean that you are failing in your walk with God. Instead saying no means that you recognize your limits as a person, and the necessity of taking rest in Jesus, and taking time to spend in solitude with Him, and/or to take proper care of the body that God has given to you. Just like we rest a part of our physical bodies that have been working constantly, as part of the body of Christ, we also need to feel free to take time to rest and recharge.

Sometimes you have no. Because you don't have the time, or you don't have the energy, or you don't have the expertise. Maybe the timing is just all wrong. And that's okay. Don't let having to say no to someone make you feel like you've done something wrong, even if they try to make you feel guilty about it. Pray for the grace and the discernment to know when (and how) to say no, because sometimes, you have to. Remember that even Jesus withdrew from the crowds at times to rest and recharge.

Do you have instances where you've had to say no? Share them in the comments below, if you would like to!

Be blessed and say no sometimes!

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Biweekly Bits #19: Don't Miss the Message!

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Don't miss a message from God because you don't like the container it came in. God speaks through anything, and indeed, God speaks through everything. The Bible is filled with stories of the crazy things and messed-up people that God has used to get the attention of His people.

This is a tough lesson that I've been learning over the past few years. I think it's human nature to discredit a message because we object to the person that the message came from. We may not agree with their theology, or their lifestyle, or their appearance, so we say that their words cannot possibly be true, God could not possibly have called them. We miss the voice of God sometimes because our pride does not allow us to listen when He speaks through things that may seem unholy or unworthy. But the truth is, God can and does speak through any and everything in all of His creation. 

He may use the lowliest of people, or the worst of sinners to teach us about his grace and love and sovereignty. [Similarly, because we hear words from a favoured preacher, or someone that we consider to be upstanding and righteous, doesn't mean that they are from God.] I think it's human nature to correlate the appearance of the speaker with the truth of the message. But when we do this, we tell God that He is only limited to speaking through things that we determine appropriate. We take the sovereignty from God and place it on ourselves. We forget that God spoke through a bush, and a donkey, and a child, and many, many, many sinners.

It is our duty then to develop and use our discernment so that we can hear God no matter how He may choose to speak to us. Let us rebuke the pride that tells us that God cannot speak through those that we think are less holy, less worthy or less spiritually mature than we are. Let us not miss his voice because we don't like the way it sounds.

Be blessed and shine!

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Biweekly Bits #18: Wilderness and Growth

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Everyone needs a wilderness experience. Seriously, at least one. College in Ithaca was mine. I was far away, basically in the middle of nowhere, and I knew no one when I got there. Ithaca has been the place where I've spent some of the loneliest days of my life thus far. It's also the place where I have grown the most, both as a person and as a follower of Christ. Some lifelong friends have also come out of that Ithaca experience. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I have often wondered what person I might have become without the wilderness experiences that have shaped me. To be honest, wilderness experiences are not pleasant. I remember when I went to college, I was alone, lonely and worried about surviving my first four years of adulthood, all on my own and more than two thousand miles from the warmth of my family. I was worried that I'd fail all my classes and waste the thousands of dollars that my parents had invested in my education. I was worried that I'd be friendless, since I knew absolutely no one on campus when I arrived there.

But even through my worries I knew that I had comfort in Jesus and that I could cling to Him through every challenge that I faced. I grew leaps and bounds in my relationship with God. I met people who mentored me and challenged me and supported me. I began to mature in my faith, choosing to love and serve God for myself, and not because I grew up going to church. And in this time I learned some important lessons about wilderness experiences, a few of which I will share with you.

1. The wilderness separates us from the things that distract us

This might be the biggest and the hardest of all the lessons I learned. Sometimes we get so caught up in all that we have, and the busyness of life, that we brush God off to the side. So he uses wilderness experiences to get our attention, to draw us away from all of the things that creep in between us and Him. In the midst of his trial, when everything had been taken away from him, when his wife advised him to curse God and die, Job was able to look to God and say "I know that my Redeemer lives" (Job 19:25). He turned his full attention to God in the midst of his trial.

2. The wilderness reminds us of our need for, and dependence on our Savior Jesus

There's nothing like having nothing to do but rely on God to remind us how dependent we are on Him. We see this in the life of David, when Saul was seeking after him, which caused him to flee all that was familiar and rely totally on God for his safety and security. Yet it is in the these moments that David drew close to God, speaking of God as his refuge and strength (Ps 46), or his light and salvation (Ps 27), or his rock (Ps 18). David knew that he was utterly dependent on God, who is the provider of all things, even when we face the wilderness.

3. The wilderness forces us to grow and mature

Wilderness experiences are places of growth. They allow us to draw close to God, deeper into our knowledge of who God is, and how we can be his servants. Part of this maturing process comes in community with other believers, but there is a stage where in order to grow in intimacy with God, we must spend time in intimacy with God. In our wilderness seasons we should take the time to know God through His word, to communicate with him through prayer, to spend time in quiet reflection. The growth that we experience prepares us to face even the strongest of temptations well-armed and well-prepared.

We see this in the life of Jesus, where during his time in the wilderness, he is tempted by the devil (Matt 4:1-11). No matter what approach the devil takes, Jesus is able to respond with the word of God, in its proper context. And in these responses we can truly understand why we need our times in the wilderness. "Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of the Father" reminds us to focus on God. "Do not put the Lord your God to the test" reminds us of God's power and might, and our dependence on him, and "Worship the Lord your God and serve Him only" reminds us of our daily call to worship and serve God.

There is much to be learned from our wilderness experiences, even when we feel like life is falling apart. The wilderness strengthens us, because we are made to look only to the true source of our strength. But the wilderness is always temporary, and we should use these times to grow ever closer to God. Let us consider life's wilderness experiences as a gift from God, an opportunity for introspection and growth.

What are some wilderness experiences that you have had in life? What scriptures did you use to encourage yourself through them?

Be blessed and shine, even in the wilderness!

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Biweekly Bits #17: Timing is Important

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

The right thing at the wrong time is still the wrong thing. Have you ever thrown something away and then needed it shortly thereafter? Or found something that you really needed once you no longer had need for it? Or received something, met someone, gained an opportunity that seems wonderful, but you KNOW you aren't ready to fully receive/appreciate it? Timing is everything. More importantly, God's timing is everything.

I've often experienced this phenomenon, where right after I give or throw something away, I come across the one situation in which it would have been useful to me. It's such a frustrating position to be in! But to be honest, it never was a do or die situation: things worked out just fine without having that one thing that I thought would have been perfect for that situation. Perhaps this is one of the best illustrations of God's timing, that even when we think the circumstances are not ideal, he nudges us forward, whispering, "It's time my dear." It is in times like that that we trust God's sovereignty over our lives, knowing that if He is calling us, the time is right, and we will be fully equipped to do whatever is asked of us.

I've also experienced what might be the opposite of the former situation: a seemingly great opportunity comes along, but for some reason, you can't take it. While sometimes missed opportunities are exactly what the name suggests, there are also times when missed opportunities are the voice of God saying to us "Not yet, my dear. It's not time yet." This is particularly hard to hear when something seems to be perfect for you, except for the timing, when everything that you wanted seems to be walking right by, but you can't take hold of it. The right thing at the wrong time is still the wrong thing. It is in times like these that we trust God's sovereignty over our lives, knowing that there is a reason for "missing out", and trusting in His ability to provide for us.

The key to trusting in God's timing is trusting in God. If we pine after the "what ifs" and the "could have beens" and the general "shoulda-woulda-couldas" of life, aren't we at the same moment implying that God is not always good? Or that God cannot be trusted to provide for us once more? When Samuel was called by God (1 Samuel 3), he was confused, and he didn't understand the call. God had to call Samuel three times before Samuel finally knew how to respond. But God kept calling Samuel until he answered, because God had work for Samuel to do, and the time was right for him to do it.

As a young boy Joseph had a dream that all his brothers would bow before him (Gen 37). He knew that this was a dream from the Lord. But it was decades before Joseph saw that dream come to fruition, and before it did, he would spend years in jail in Egypt. During that time he interprets a dream for the king's cupbearer (Gen 40), who would be reinstated to his position. When the cupbearerer leaves the jail just as Joseph predicts, Joseph asks him to remember him to the king, so that Joseph too, could be released from jail. And the cupbearer does remember Joseph to the king, two years later. Joseph was probably very frustrated as the days went by and he remained in jail, but God's timing was perfect. Joseph was released from jail just in time to warn Pharaoh of an imminent famine, which would result in him being named Pharaoh's second-in-command. When the famine did come (Gen 41-42), Joseph's brothers came to Egypt to purchase food, which would place them bowing before the appointee of Pharaoh who was, yup, their brother Joseph. God provided, and did it in His time.

Every time I come to a crossroads in my life, I have a  greater appreciation for God's timing. I think we've become so used to this 21st century culture of having whatever we want, whenever we want, that we miss the beauty of the right thing coming at exactly the right time.

This time, I'm preparing to graduate, which of course means that I have to decide what I'm doing next, and as of this moment, I have absolutely no idea. It's frustrating to be so uncertain, but I remember having every single class that I wanted to take mapped out at the beginning of my freshman year of college eight years ago, and how much that changed because of the ways God moved in my life. But it is in this season that I can most appreciate God's timing, because I am confident that not only will He guide me as I make major life decisions, but also that the timing of His provision is always perfect.

So perhaps you may share this prayer with me today, that the right thing may happen at the right time. Or maybe this week you can rejoice over the beauty and perfection of God's timing in your own life.

Be blessed and shine in His time!

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Biweekly Bits #16: Dare to be Different

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Don't be afraid to be different! It is our differences that make us distinct, that make us unique. So don't be fearful of doing things a little differently from the rest of the crowd. 

This has always been a tough thing to do. As much as our society is individualistic, it only seems to value "standing out" in certain ways. And if you're one to think outside the box, be ready for a LOT of opposition.

But the truth is, throughout the Bible, everyone that God has called has gone outside of the status quo, and their faith in God to hold everything together when it all seemed to be falling apart is what made each of them able to step out and dare to go against the grain. We see this with Abraham, leaving everything familiar and going out into the desert, with Moses going to Pharaoh on behalf of the people of Israel, with young David and his slingshot in the face of Goliath, with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, with Daniel, with Hosea, with the disciples, with Paul, and most importantly, with Jesus.

So often we are afraid to be different. To be the one who speaks up and says, "actually, I don't agree", or "the Lord is leading me differently" or "my goal is a bit different from what you think it should be." We forget or ignore that we are each created uniquely, set apart to do good works for Christ (2 Tim 2:21). It is our differences as members of the Body of Christ that unify that, that make things work. And when we try to fit in, we cast off what God has called us to do, almost as if we're telling God that He should have given our purpose to someone else.

When Jesus called the first sets of disciples, the basic expectation was that they would do things differently from the standard worldview. In fact, a great part of Jesus' ministry here on earth was challenging the status quo, making people think differently about how they related to and approached God. 

Jesus still calls us to be disciples, and that still means that it is a call to be different.

So what to do? Listen when God whispers to you to swim against the tide. Walk boldly when no one wants to walk with you. Dare to be different, to be the unique person that God has created you to be. Live a life worthy of your calling (Eph 4:1), guided by the Holy Spirit.

Be blessed and shine daringly and differently!

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Biweekly Bits #15: You Never Know...

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

You never know who is praying for you. As a teenager, I was involved in a dance ministry at my church, a part of which was a combined group with dancers from other churches. Every year we'd have a little awards ceremony. One year, the leaders gave out tokens of appreciation for the adults who had prayed for us over the year. Many of the people who got up to receive these little gifts I had never seen before in my life, but because I was a member of the dance ministry, they were praying for me! How awesome is that?! You just never know who's interceding on your behalf, lifting you up in prayer.

Every week at my church we have prayer cards which members write, which are then read aloud to the congregation. Sometimes the prayers are for some members of the church praying for others within the church, but oftentimes they are for people who are not present. In fact, many times I have heard people offer prayer requests for friends and coworkers and loved ones who may never know that this person is praying for them.

But that is part of the beauty of prayer: to intercede on behalf of another, petitioning God on their behalf. And as much as we may pray (or neglect to pray) for others in our lives, many times there are people who are praying on our behalf. As a PK (preacher's kid), it is so interesting to return home for the holidays and have people that I don't know come up and talk to me conversationally, because they have been praying for my family for so long, it is like we are friends. It is such a blessing to know that others are lifting me up in prayer, and my life has been blessed through the prayers of others.

So I guess my challenge to you is to pray for someone else. It can be someone close to you, or someone you don't know well, or at all. But take some time to lift up another in prayer, to talk to God on their behalf, either with them as they lift up their own prayers, or for them if they do not know Him. And you don't necessarily have to tell them that you have been praying for them. (Of course, you should if you have been led to.)

Be a blessing to someone else by earnestly and unselfishly praying for them, praying for God's will (not what you think God's will should be) in their life. After all, you never know who has been praying for you!

Be blessed and pray for someone!

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Biweekly Bits #14: A Pair of Shoes?

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Marriage is like a pair of shoes. This one, interestingly enough, came from my graduate school mentor. She told me that it doesn't matter how cute or fancy they are on the outside, if you're going to wear them for a long time, they need to be comfortable (and sturdily made). I hope to make use of this bit of wisdom someday.

At 26, it seems like everyone in my life is getting married. Clearly everyone isn't, but there have definitely been wedding photos in my Facebook newsfeed every week for the past 2-3 months, and lots of engagement statuses/photos in the months before that. Not to mention the people in my life who are already married are celebrating anniversaries all over the place. [And then there's me, single as a dollar bill... womp, womp.]

However, I think this applies to any and every relationship that you'd like to last a long time: don't go for the cuteness, or the flashiness or the fashionableness, all of those external things that fade away, and are only for aesthetics anyway. What really matters when you get a pair of shoes for a long walk is that they are well-suited to your feet, they are comfortable, and they are well-made.

Anyone who has spent a long time wearing an uncomfortable pair of shoes can testify that it is not fun after a while. And you may end up with corns and bruises and sore muscles which may last quite a while after you take the shoes off. And if on your walk you come across wet or icy ground wearing the wrong shoes for that weather, you could end up seriously injured.

I guess the same wisdom can be applied to marriages. Granted you definitely should be physically attracted to your spouse, but what matters more is your spouse's character, their beliefs, and their values; attributes that, when poorly matched with yours, make for sore feet on your long walk (or a much shorter walk than you planned for).

So I guess marriage can be like a pair of shoes? Clearly the metaphor has its limits, but there's still a bit of wisdom here.

All of this shoe-talk makes me want to buy some shoes. =)


Be blessed and shine your shoes! (lol)

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Biweekly Bits #13: Be Thankful

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Be thankful. Even when life does its absolute worst, be thankful that you are alive. Be thankful that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. Be thankful when you have a cold, because it means that your immune system is functional. Just be thankful. (See also #1)

In several of his letters to the various churches, Paul calls on us to be thankful. It may seem like an obvious response, but the truth is we often forget that every good thing is a gift from God (James 1:17). God constantly and consistently provides for us, and God is good even when we are not.

Sometimes, we take for granted that the sunset, the air we breathe, the stunning flower, the majestic tree, the beautiful smile, and anything and everything that we appreciate in life come from God, the maker of all things. That alone should have us singing praises and thanks to God all day, every day. God, our Creator, is worthy of our gratitude.

In addition to this, anyone who has walked with God for even a moment has seen the ways that God provides for us. Sometimes it is through meeting our material needs, or our emotional yearnings, or our spiritual shortfalls, but every day and in every way, God's providence blesses us. We may not even realise how God has moved in our lives, but we know that the Giver of all things is constantly doing things for our good. This is a reason to give thanks! God, our Provider, is worthy of our gratitude.

But there is more! Greater than the gift of each new day, is the Gift that makes the newness of each day significant. That gift is of God's Son, Jesus, who died for our sin, and rose for our justification. Jesus' death and resurrection enable us to draw near to God, cleanse us of our unrighteousness, and give us the promise of being united with God when our lives on earth are done. And best of all, this gift was free, through the grace of God (Romans 6:23). We don't do anything to earn it, and it has no limits. We should be constantly rejoicing, giving God thanks for sending His Son to atone for our depravity. God, our Redeemer, is worthy of our gratitude.

So today, whenever you think of it, give God thanks. Sing songs of thanksgiving to God. Even when you're having the most terrible day, give God thanks that you are alive to see it, and that his mercies are new each day. Constantly and consistently remind yourself to be thankful. God has given you much.

Be blessed and shine thankfully!

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Biweekly Bits #12: Things Taken Away

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

There's a blessing in things taken away too. Most of the time, when we think of God's blessings, we think of things given to us. Blessings are indeed gifts from God, but there are times when the "gift" is something being taken away, instead of being given.

I think very often, particularly in western Christian culture, we are taught to believe that God blesses us by giving us things, whether it is by providing material things or giving us less tangible spiritual blessings. And it's true, God gives us many things which add to our lives. But when God takes something away from us, we almost without exception see it as a negative thing, a burden of the human condition to be borne. Yet we forget to consider, to remember, that sometimes the blessing is in the things that God takes away from us.

Here are four points to meditate on when it comes to the things that God may take away:

Sometimes God takes something away to give us something greater.

Sometimes God takes something away to change our perspective.

Sometimes God takes something away to change our focus.

Sometimes God takes something away because its season is over.

I remember a few years ago a friend of mine lost his job, rather unexpectedly. He was pretty upset about it, and very disappointed, but I remember saying to him that losing that particular job was a good thing, because God was taking him to new places in his ministry, and the job would have been a burden. And sure enough, my friend has been richly blessed in the years that have passed since losing that job. Every step of the way God has provided.

We always think of loss as something to be sad about, and many times it is. It's a scary thing to lose a job, or for a relationship to end, or even to lose a favourite item that you own. But sometimes, even in the midst of losing a job or an opportunity, or having a friendship or relationship end, there is joy, because the Lord has still blessed us.

Be blessed and shine with joy!

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Biweekly Bits #11: Patience is a Practice

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Patience is a practice. I know you've heard "patience is a virtue" many times, and it is, but it is also a practice. It is intentionally telling yourself to take a moment, or several moments, to calm down/cool your blood/think things through before acting or reacting. You train yourself to be patient, and it is just like training as a runner: every time you can go a little bit further, and you do get to a point where you can't go on anymore. But the more you train, the further away that point becomes, until you can run one of those super-marathon things without dying (or collapsing, or just giving up). (See also #3.)

This has been one of the hard lessons of my life, as it probably is for many. We're told that patience is a virtue, and we know that it is part of the fruit of the spirit, but no one really talks about how we become patient. However, I've learned through the years that patience is intentional, and requires practice.

So, how do we practice patience? Here are three steps:

1. Pray - prayer should always be the first step. Patience is challenging, challenges require prayer to overcome them. Pray for insight into why you need patience: is it in a specific area of your life? Pray for strength to be patient despite the situation. Pray for people in your life who encourage you to be patient.

2. Put it in context - when you find your patience wearing thin, sometimes context can help. Is an extra five minutes spent waiting that important? Is it something worth stressing over? How can this be used for God's glory?

3. Place things in God's hands - when it comes to big things, sometimes we are impatient because we lack control. We think that we know when is the best time, or the exact sequence of events that would be most ideal. We don't, but God does. Trust Him to know when the time is right.

There are two big things to learn here too. First, is that patience doesn't make you a pushover. Because you are patient doesn't mean that you allow others to take advantage of your time or your life. What is more important is that your life is prioritised differently. As a matter of fact, patience is impossible without God's insight into what takes precedence.

The second thing is that being patient when waiting for some things to happen will help us be content with what is happening. Our contentment comes from confidence that God is working, even when it seems like nothing is happening. Patience in the long wait gives us the chance to enjoy the journey, instead of just anticipating the destination.

So, let us make a practice of patience, with the little things, like waiting in line, and with the big things, like waiting for God to fulfil a promise to us. The patience is worth the wait.

Be blessed and shine with patience!

Biweekly Bits #10: Everyone expects 100%

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Everyone expects 100%. When I was a junior in college, one of my professors said this to me. She explained to me that in every single thing I do, everyone expects me to do it to 100% of my ability and make it a priority. Clearly, if you do five different things, chances are you'd give each about 20%, but that's not what people expect. Each person expects 100%, no matter how many other things you have on your plate.

This week's bit could be seen as part 2 of the last one. I think this one is more applicable to ministry. We have become a society of busyness, where we do hundreds of things, so many, if fact, that we can't do them all well. When it comes to our churches it is no different. We've somehow persuaded ourselves that as a "good Christian" we must participate in every single church activity or committee or event.

Apparently, busyness correlates to holiness these days, and it seems like a sin to tell someone that asks you to participate in yet another church endeavor that you simply don't have the time.

But when we do this, we miss the point of it all. If we are serving God by serving others, would it not be better to serve with excellence in a few things, than to serve in many mediocre ways? Won't others be better able to see Christ working in us by our dedication to the things we do, and not by our striving to do too many things at once?

So, let us ponder this. How can we give God 100%? How can we give others that we serve 100%? It is not by doing as many good things as we can, but in doing as much good as we can. And what good is it to serve with our attention divided among many activities? To be so busy doing things, that our souls are too exhausted to spend some time with the only One who has the power to renew them?

Let us never be so busy doing things for God, in our various forms of service and ministry, that we forget to do things with God as our focus. Let us aim to do the things to which we can give our 100%. This is not a call to perfection, but a call to dedication.

Be blessed and shine at 100%!

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Biweekly Bits #9: Excellence

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

If you're going to do anything, do it properly. If I had a dollar for every time my mother said this to me growing up, I wouldn't have student loans. And she was right. Anything and everything that you do should be done to the best of your ability. Anything and everything in your life can minister to others. If everything you do is sloppily done or poorly put together, what message are you sending? (See also 1 Cor 10:31 & Col 3:17).

Sometimes, life is busy. Actually, most of the time, life is busy. There always seems to be so much to be done, and so little time to do it in. And the focus always seems to be on getting things done, and not necessarily on doing things well.

One of the lessons that my mother drilled into my head as a child (and an adult) is the importance of excellence, of doing things well. Sometimes getting it done is not enough, it needs to be done well. As representatives of Christ here on earth, this is doubly important, particularly in the ways that we serve others.

If everything we do, is done to God's glory, as Paul instructs us in 1 Corinthians 10:31, then we must work towards excellence, for God's glory is more than worth our best efforts. And if everything is in the name of Jesus, as Paul tells us in Colossians 3:17, then we must aim for excellence, for Jesus' name is worthy of it.

But what does that mean? It doesn't mean that we should do everything perfectly, at least, not according to our human standards of perfection, for sometimes the will of God is done through our mistakes. It does not mean either, that we should only attempt to do the things that we know we can do with great skill, for the glory of God is often done where our skill fails.

Doing things in excellence means that in everything we do, we give our best to it, not just physically, but also spiritually. We do all that we can to allow the will of God to be done for the glory of God. We give ourselves in all that we do, not halfheartedly, or with lackluster, but fully and completely. We are present in every task. We give our very best, our first fruits, our lambs without blemish.

Excellence is not about perfection. It's about the practice of sacrifice, the habit of being present in all that we do.

Be blessed and shine in excellence!

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Biweekly Bits #8: Intentions vs Behavior

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

"We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behavior." -Stephen R. Covey. I don't think I need to add anything to this.

 This quote by Stephen Covey is a great self-check quote. It reminds us of two things:

1. Things are not always perceived the way we intend them.

2. Things are not always intended the way we perceive them.

Every time I read this one, it makes me stop and think about how my behavior may be perceived, regardless of my intention, and also think that because I don't always know the intent of another person, it may be unfair to pass judgement on their behavior.

This is not to say that everyone gets a free pass to do anything, because they didn't mean this or they did mean that, but rather that in some situations, it is worthwhile to try to put on the shoes of another to understand their perspective. Too often we make snap judgements based on what people do, never giving them a chance to explain themselves and or rectify their behavior. Of course, some behavior is inexcusable, regardless of intent, but oftentimes, we get offended by the actions of others based on what we think they meant by it, and not so much by what they actually have done. It's hard to forgive others when you hold onto your previous judgement of what they have done.

On the other hand, this is cause for self-reflection. There have been times when I have had to apologize for something that I'd done because what I meant by it what not what was interpreted in the situation. Case in point:

I remember in an essay that I wrote when I was 11 or 12, I mentioned that my teacher (who was grading the assignment) was sarcastic. Now, if you've met me, you'd know that I'm very sarcastic, and thus when I wrote that about her, it was in admiration. Unfortunately, she didn't agree, and I ended up having to write her an apology. But I learned something important there: just because that was what I meant, it didn't mean that what I did didn't seem offensive. After all, she didn't know my thought process, she only knew my actions.

This intention vs behavior quote also reminds me of the necessity of spiritual discernment. As people, we get so caught up in outward manifestations: actions, appearances and the like, when God is really concerned about the heart. Part of my prayers for discernment have been for an understanding of the heart behind people, so that I can look beyond the actions. Very often, actions can only hint at the tumultuous nature of the heart. We bury and harbor so many things there: hurts and aches and pains and longings, but when it overflows into our actions, into our words, it is only relayed in part. That's why social workers and healthcare professionals are trained to look at signs, because there is often a disconnect between what we do, and what we think or how we feel.

So here's the challenge: pray for the eyes to understand the intentions. Sometimes they are exactly what you perceive them to be. But sometimes, we'd be surprised to understand the motivation of others that drives their actions.

Be blessed and shine with different eyes.

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Biweekly Bits #7: Life Lessons from Salmonburgers

After writing 26 bits, I realized that there is so much I could elaborate on with each of my bits. So I decided to turn them into a biweekly (i.e. fortnightly) series, for the next year.

Sometimes, your family will eat all the salmonburgers. Several years ago, I made salmonburgers for my family. Salmonburgers are pretty much what they sound like, burgers made from salmon. They are hand-made, homemade deliciousness in-between bread. Anyway, I made a bunch of them and left them in the kitchen. My family members ate them all. I didn't get a single one. None. But it's okay, because the salmon burgers were still delicious, and they enjoyed them. There's a lesson in there somewhere, I think.

I don't know why this story sticks in my head so much, but it does. I remember that evening, I wasn't angry at everyone for eating all the salmonburgers, I mostly just...surprised. I didn't expect them all to disappear that quickly. My family really enjoyed them, they told me as much (rather sheepishly) when they discovered that I hadn't gotten any. And from this story, here are  three life lessons that can be learned from this salmonburgers story.

1. Sometimes your best efforts will be in service of someone else. (This one actually came from my sister, who commented on the original 26 bits post.) Sometimes you put in all this work solely for the benefit of someone else. In fact, that's really what serving should be. Me, doing my best, for someone else.

2. Sometimes your job is to do the work, not to eat the fruit. Okay, so this was not the case here, I was supposed to be making dinner for the entire family, including myself. But, sometimes this does happen: you work towards a goal, you work on a project, you contribute to task, and you don't get to reap any of the rewards. In those times, perhaps things happen that way to remind us that there is merit in being the one to lay the foundation, even if you never get the benefit of seeing the completed house.

3. Sometimes the joy comes from planting the harvest, and not from reaping it. Making those salmonburgers was an enjoyable experience. It's a very simple recipe, and I used my hands to mix all the ingrediants and to put the patty together. I got to watch them browning in the pan, and I smelled the first scents of the deliciousness that was coming.

All three of these points remind me of the words of Paul in 1 Corinthians 3. The church at Corinth had been facing divisions, fighting each other based on which of the preachers/teachers had brought taught them of the Gospel. Rather than focus on who brought the message, he pointed out to the Corinthians that no matter who planted the seed, and who watered it, it was God that caused the growth. We are all God's servants in ministering to others, who are God's field, His building. The point that Paul was making here was that looking at who had done the work to bring the Gospel and lead the people was irrelevant. What mattered was God's glory being seen in the harvest.

So next time you do all the work, but do not get to eat, ahem, I mean, reap the benefits, take joy in being able to serve others.

Be blessed and shine serving others!

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